Vox cani

I bought this
coffee grinder, from Amazon for £20. The review claimed that " if you are prepared
to unscrew its setting ring and twist its setting wheel a quarter of a turn
clockwise it will produce fine espresso grounds worthy of a machine 4 times its
price." I like my coffee, and I don't mind mechanical things, so i thought this
was a good idea.

When I got it, its finest setting produced grounds that weren't quite up to
espresso standard, though they'd have suited a cafétière. I duly undertook to
unscrew this setting ring. Of course the damn thing doesn't unscrew. A week or
two later, I've finally managed. This took two pen-knives; plyers; a
fish-gutter; a socket set; and a screw-driver. All of the unscrewing of things
actually achieved nothing. The setting ring is removed, it turns out, solely by
means of prizing it off with hands and knives, whilst trying not to snap plastic
bits. The setting ring inside didn't want to move, but it did adjust with the
aid of two darts. I forgot to keep a note of its original location, as with it
not moving at first, I didn't expect it to begin to move.

Once adjusted, I put everything back together again and pressed grind. The
motor just whined at me, without doing anything, so I took it apart and adjusted
until the motor could turn again. Grand. So I put coffee in to grind. It came
out slower than I have ever seen, which worried me a bit, I shook it to help,
and then I noticed the smoke coming out. I turned down the fineness again.

When I did finally get some coffee out, my espresso machine (cheap at £25-50, but 15-bar at that)
could hardly get water through it, but with the non-uniform grind from my trying
to stop the grinder burning out, it wasn't that nice. So I'll try again.

The grinder motor is cooling down to room temperature now though...

# posted by Chris @ 4:10 pm 2 comments

Why can't you trust ducks?

Because they're on quack.

# posted by Chris @ 10:53 am 3 comments

Irony is hard to explain, but surely something of its nature is contained in
my joy at Paris Hilton's 'Screwed' coming up on Party Shuffle. It's hard not to
enjoy a chorus that opens "Since I'm already screwed / Here's a message to
you."

This gets better: dancey keyboard breakdown... Yes: the chorus had to follow
and it did, whoever crafted this knew what they were doing!

# posted by Chris @ 2:15 pm 0 comments